Series in Dark Humor
Books in Dark Humor
A Singular Man
What will happen to George Smith? Mysteriously rich and desperately lonely, George appears to be under attack from all quarters: his former wife and four horrible children are suing to get his money; his dipsomaniacal housekeeper is trying to arouse his carnal interest; his secretary, the beautiful, blond Miss Thomson, will barely give him the time of day. Making matters even worse are the threatening letters: Dear Sir: Only for the moment are we saying nothing. Yours, etc., Present Associates. Despite such precautions as a two-inch-thick surgical steel door and a bullet-proof limousine, Smith remains worried. So he undertakes to build a giant mausoleum, complete with plumbing, in which to live. Hunter S. Thompson called reading this book like sitting down to an evening of good whisky and mad laughter in a rare conversation somewhere on the edge of reality.”
All at Sea
I've written many stories set in the 18th Century, detailing the activities of naval heroes, as well as villains and even, I suppose, raised the odd smile. Yet there were things to wonder and laugh at as well, many more to shock modern sensibilities. It is to these I have turned in The Wormwood Saga, a series of stories in what, I hope, will appeal to the readers’ sense of humour in the same way as, when writing them, it tickled mine. Numerous books on Nelson's Navy tell of heroic deeds, as upright patriots sought to confound Britannia's enemies. Yet for every sailor committed to defeating his country's foes, there were many more with motives less upright, some expressing notions which today would be considered downright treasonous. In the late 18th Century, nothing could be gained without interest or the aid of the powerful and wealthy, while the spectre of poverty was ever-present. There were no cracks in social provision, they were chasms and one simple error could damn any man or woman to a precipitous fall.Given such jeopardy was a daily concern, it was seen perfectly acceptable to look to one's own concerns as well as, and even prior to, the needs of the nation. In the narrative of the wars against the French, these characters and their activities have been alluded to but, in truth, mostly lightly brushed over. No more!The Wormwood Saga seeks to redress this imbalance by taking you into the world of men, both civilian and serving, who saw the public purse as an extension of their own, of time serving captains and useless admirals, of the ingrates who pandered to the wishes of the rich and politically well-connected, as well as the devious activities of a lower deck often wiser and more self-serving than their superiors. But it is also the world of those foolish or deluded enough to be downright dangerous? Into this era of commonplace venality comes Charles de Vere Wormwood, scion of a rich, noble and corrupt father, a sailor by parental coercion rather than inclination. Forced to make his way, as best he can, in a profession he abhors, while also entirely lacking in even a semblance of courage, Wormwood will dissemble, lie and cheat his way up the naval ladder in the hope of rising high enough to get out of ever having to go to sea again, an aim in which he will be constantly thwarted.In doing so he will encounter some of the great figures of the age, none of whom, in his estimation, live up to the legends being created around their name. Quite the reverse: every hero has an Achilles Heel, either vainglorious or too trusting, and this is what Wormwood will seek and exploit in pursuit of his own interest. All the tropes of Naval Fiction are there in these short stories: Press Gangs, floggings, battles won and lost, acts of bravery and foolish bravado, added to the deviousness required by Wormwood to never put himself at risk. This is an aim continually ruined by a hero worshiping and eager subordinates, while being partly mitigated by the least desirable servant of the time.It was also an age of debauchery and one into which our hero will happily throw himself. Handsome and an immoral rogue, Charles Wormwood will employ seduction as well as charm and downright falsehood to bend both sexes to his needs and ambitions. Too often though, his desires and a lack of self-control will give him more trouble than pleasure, in what is known to posterity as the Age of Enlightenment.Join me as I throw a little light of the obverse side of the coin. DAVID DONACHIE
All at Sea
I've written many stories set in the 18th Century, detailing the activities of naval heroes, as well as villains and even, I suppose, raised the odd smile. Yet there were things to wonder and laugh at as well, many more to shock modern sensibilities. It is to these I have turned in The Wormwood Saga, a series of stories in what, I hope, will appeal to the readers’ sense of humour in the same way as, when writing them, it tickled mine. Numerous books on Nelson's Navy tell of heroic deeds, as upright patriots sought to confound Britannia's enemies. Yet for every sailor committed to defeating his country's foes, there were many more with motives less upright, some expressing notions which today would be considered downright treasonous. In the late 18th Century, nothing could be gained without interest or the aid of the powerful and wealthy, while the spectre of poverty was ever-present. There were no cracks in social provision, they were chasms and one simple error could damn any man or woman to a precipitous fall.Given such jeopardy was a daily concern, it was seen perfectly acceptable to look to one's own concerns as well as, and even prior to, the needs of the nation. In the narrative of the wars against the French, these characters and their activities have been alluded to but, in truth, mostly lightly brushed over. No more!The Wormwood Saga seeks to redress this imbalance by taking you into the world of men, both civilian and serving, who saw the public purse as an extension of their own, of time serving captains and useless admirals, of the ingrates who pandered to the wishes of the rich and politically well-connected, as well as the devious activities of a lower deck often wiser and more self-serving than their superiors. But it is also the world of those foolish or deluded enough to be downright dangerous? Into this era of commonplace venality comes Charles de Vere Wormwood, scion of a rich, noble and corrupt father, a sailor by parental coercion rather than inclination. Forced to make his way, as best he can, in a profession he abhors, while also entirely lacking in even a semblance of courage, Wormwood will dissemble, lie and cheat his way up the naval ladder in the hope of rising high enough to get out of ever having to go to sea again, an aim in which he will be constantly thwarted.In doing so he will encounter some of the great figures of the age, none of whom, in his estimation, live up to the legends being created around their name. Quite the reverse: every hero has an Achilles Heel, either vainglorious or too trusting, and this is what Wormwood will seek and exploit in pursuit of his own interest. All the tropes of Naval Fiction are there in these short stories: Press Gangs, floggings, battles won and lost, acts of bravery and foolish bravado, added to the deviousness required by Wormwood to never put himself at risk. This is an aim continually ruined by a hero worshiping and eager subordinates, while being partly mitigated by the least desirable servant of the time.It was also an age of debauchery and one into which our hero will happily throw himself. Handsome and an immoral rogue, Charles Wormwood will employ seduction as well as charm and downright falsehood to bend both sexes to his needs and ambitions. Too often though, his desires and a lack of self-control will give him more trouble than pleasure, in what is known to posterity as the Age of Enlightenment.Join me as I throw a little light of the obverse side of the coin. DAVID DONACHIE
Death and Buses
Hannah has delusions of grandeur, Liam delusions of adequacy. When they get together, sparks fly, as well as all kinds of bodily fluids. In this dark, sexy and wickedly funny novella, Amber Benson really lets it rip.
Headline Love
A standalone book that's the second in a series. "ROM COM WITH HAIR EXTENSIONS" Can a girl marry a guy if his name sounds like a mechanically operated sex toy? After a successful working partnership and a blossoming carnal relationship, Abigail Love and her boyfriend, Will, have moved up to London together to join their YouTube news channel, Prime Time Today. But all is quiet, and with nothing much to report on, Abigail’s job is soon under threat, along with her relationship. Fortunately for her, McDongle makes a timely appearance. ABOUT THE AUTHOR David Blake is the author of the brand new series of laugh out loud Abigail Love books. This first one is a funny British romantic comedy that is basically a love story. It’s also been described as chic lit, but it’s probably not. However, people are saying that it is one of the best rom com books that they’ve ever read. He’s also written a series of funny books about Inspector Capstan that form the back story to this new series.
High Society
The war on drugs has been lost, but afraid to face that fact, the whole world is rapidly becoming one vast criminal network. From the Groucho Club toilets to the poppy fields of Afghanistan, we are all partners in crime, and this story takes us through the landscape it has created.
Hit Radio
Franco Scarvetti has a problem. His psycho son has whacked a made man. Now a rival Family is out to do the same to his son. So Big Frank comes up with a plan. He sends his pride and joy to run a radio station in a small town while he tries to smooth things over. But Big Frank never read Shakespeare and he forgets that a psycho by any other name is still....a psycho.HIT RADIO by David Robbins is a hilarious romp through the brutal world of the Mafia. Throw in two star-crossed young lovers, a hitman with a heart of ice, and you have a story that you won't want to put down once you start reading.
Ideal Girl
Best Selling Ideal Girl For fans of Marian Keyes, Carol Marinelli and Call the Midwife, and for readers that prefer plausible characters and romance that pulls at the heart strings. Nurse Liddy Murphy is meant to be the Ideal Girl, but for whom? Up until now all the men she's met have let her down. That is until she meets Mitch. Professor Mitch Merrien is disillusioned. Following the break-up of the latest in a string of relationships he's in search of yet another tall ice cool blond to fill that place in his bed, if not his heart. That is until he literally falls over short, dark and decidedly feisty Liddy. Working side by side on St Justin's Head Injury Unit is a dream come true for both of them until the unthinkable happens. Lost and alone Liddy escapes Ireland to live in France. She escapes her previous life and everything she holds dear. But she can't escape the memories of her past. She can't escape her dreams just as she can't escape him. Ideal Girl is the first in a trilogy of stand-alone sweet heart-warming romances The next two in the series 'Girl Descending' and 'Unhappy Ever After Girl' are also available.
King of the Ants
Sean is a drifter who is working as a building laborer and waiting for something to happen in his life. When he is offered easy money to tail someone and even more easy money to dispose of him, the prospect of some adventure and fast cash is extremely tempting. Sean doesn't even know the man, and there's no chance of being caught. Soon, however, it becomes apparent that he is caught in an intricate plot, and there doesn’t seem to be any easy means of escape.
Prime Time Love
A standalone book that's the first in a series. ROM COM WITH A VODKA & COKE Can a girl fall for a guy if his name sounds like a mechanically operated sex toy? Abigail Love and her new cameraman, Will, were in the same class at school. Ten years later they find themselves in the same company, but at first, neither can remember who the other one is. As they start to date, what happens when they find out, especially when Will realises that it was Abigail who'd teased him into early therapy? ABOUT THE AUTHOR David Blake is the author of the brand new series of laugh out loud Abigail Love books. This first one is a funny British romantic comedy that is basically a love story. It’s also been described as chic lit, but it’s probably not. However, people are saying that it is one of the best rom com books that they’ve ever read, apart from books by Nick Spalding of course. He’s also written a series of funny books about Inspector Capstan that form the back story to this new series.
Promising Young Women
SHORTLISTED FOR THE IRISH BOOK AWARDS - NEWCOMER OF THE YEAR 'So brilliant ... I highly recommend it' Dolly Alderton 'I loved it. The writing is whipsmart and so witty' Marian Keyes Jane Peters is an adrift twenty-something by day, and a world-weary agony aunt by night. But when an office party goes too far, Jane dissolves into the high-stakes world of being the Other Woman: a role she has the right advice for, but not the smarts to follow through on. What starts out as a drunken mistake quickly unravels as Jane discovers that sex and power go hand-in-hand, and that it's hard to keep your head when you've become someone else's dirty little secret. And soon, her friendships, her sanity and even her life are put into jeopardy... 'A future classic.' Jane Casey ' Sharp, pithy and engaging ' Irish Times ' Brilliant ' Elle 'Deeply relatable and darkly comic ... It'll have you nodding with familiarity, thinking, laughing - and crying - as you race towards the end ' Grazia 'I loved Promising Young Women. It's like Bluebeard crossed with The Yellow Wallpaper neck-deep in zeitgeist. If Angela Carter was stuck in a soulless corporate job this would be the dark, delicious result ' Sharlene Teo, author of Ponti
Sir Apropos of Nothing
Apropos is a product of a violent childhood. Estranged from his prostitute mother, fatherless since his unfortunate conception, Apropos makes his living as a thief. But when the death of a young girl rattles his conscience, and when he forges an unlikely alliance with a hero of true nobility, Apropos finds himself confronting for the first time in his life the selfish nature of his maverick, every-man-for-himself ethos. At times a loyal friend, at others a ruthless betrayer, Apropos is fast approaching the moment when he must choose between honor and safety, between the core of nobility residing in his heart and the shame that has haunted him through life. A darkly atmospheric tale rich with tension and unexpected turns of fate, SIR APROPOS OF NOTHING is crafted by Peter David with both penetrating wit and subtle poignancy. Treating the fantasy genre to an invigorating overhaul, David delivers something altogether new and original, starring a character as familiar as yesterday—and as new as tomorrow.