Diddly Squat Books

Welcome back to Clarkson's farm. At the end of Jeremy's first year, Diddly Squat farm rewarded him with profits of £ 144. And while he's mastered the art of moaning, challenges still abound. Who knew loading a trailer was more demanding than flying a gunship? That cows were more dangerous than motor-racing? Or that it's easier to get planning permission for a nuclear power station than turning an old barn into a restaurant? Life on Clarkson's farm may not always go according to plan. But not a day goes by when Jeremy can't say 'I've done a thing' and mean it...

Get tucked in to a third bestselling helping of Clarkson's Farm from our favourite wellie-wearing wannabe farmer, Jeremy Clarkson 'Brilliant . . . laugh-out-loud' Daily Telegraph 'Outrageously funny . . . will have you in stitches' Time Out --- After three years, Jeremy Clarkson has discovered the golden rule of farming: whatever you hope will happen, won't. Enthusiastic schemes to diversify face defeat at the hands of the Council Planning department, or derision from Kaleb . Jeremy's plans for a business empire founded on rewilding and nettle soup are doubted by Lisa . And the stifling thickets of red tape keep only one person smiling – Cheerful Charlie, who charges by the hour. But the animals couldn’t be happier. A rented bull called Break-Heart Maestro is delighting the cows . The pigs are bringing home the bacon. And the goats are . . . most probably psychopaths. Yet on the good days it hard not to be optimistic. Where else do you get to harvest blackberries with a vacuum cleaner? Maybe it’s not just Break-heart Maestro who gets a happy ending? ---- Readers are loving Diddly Squat: Pigs Might Fly ‘Another funny book from Jeremy. This one made me chuckle but, my only complaint it's too short. I wanted more. Hopefully Another book is being written as we speak’ ***** Reader Review ‘I love the show and I love the books. Both make me chuckle but have also given me an insight into farming and how hard farming is’ **** Reader Review ‘I’ve read the previous books and loved those as well. Witty and funny with depth and a bit of seriousness’ **** Reader Review ‘Loved it, quickest book I've ever read. Can't wait for the next Clarkson instalment’ **** Reader Review

It's been another memorable year on Diddly Squat Farm - will the chickens finally come home to roost? Welcome back to Clarkson’s Farm . . . Where the spring barley crop has failed. Just like the oil seed rape. And the oats turned the colour of a hearing aid. The mushrooms went mouldy. While the sheep, pigs and cows cost more than they earned. At least, the farm shop’s doing a roaring trade in candles – even if they smell like Jeremy’s knacker hammock. So never mind the rain, the skirmishes with the local planning department and the gargantuan hole in Jeremy’s wallet. Because it’s hard to feel too gloomy about life when there’s a JCB telehandler, a crop-spraying hovercraft and a digger waiting in the barn. For any man with several metric tons of powerful machinery at his fingertips must be doing something right . . . Number 1 Sunday Times bestseller, October 2024