The Ronnie and Bernard Adventures Books

England, 1972: Daytime soap stars Ronnie and Bernard are drawn into a bizarre mystery involving a country estate, a stone circle, and a chamber that defies the laws of time. Ronnie is a hard-drinking, self-deluded dinosaur with a gift for exaggeration. Whether claiming he once shared a stage with Laurence Olivier or believing he’s destined to be the next James Bond, his imagination knows no bounds. Bernard, a stand-up comedian with a troubled past, is struggling to move on from a failed marriage. Despite this, his career is on the rise, while Ronnie’s is very much on the wane, a situation Ronnie is keen to correct. When Bernard’s uncle dies, the duo attend the will reading, only to discover that Bernard must spend a night in a remote country house to claim his inheritance. Thus begins an epic adventure involving ghostly apparitions, travel to both the past and the future, and an ancient evil that threatens the entire world. The Crooked Line is a madcap blend of mystery, nostalgia, and humour, perfect for fans of 1970s British comedy, Carry On films, and classic Doctor Who.

England, 1974: When Ronnie and Bernard find themselves trapped in a seaside theatre, they come face to face with a music hall legend missing since 1906. After their long-running soap opera is axed, actors Ronnie and Bernard face differing fortunes. Bernard is much in demand, heading straight off to Yorkshire Television to film a new sitcom. Ronnie, on the other hand, looks washed up. With the only offer on the table being the new Bungle in Rainbow, things are bleak indeed. When millionaire holiday camp owner Bobby Burton offers Bernard the lead in his Christmas panto, he jumps at the chance and brings Ronnie along for the ride. Together they travel to the up-and-coming resort of Skegmouth, where a weekend of comedic mishaps ensues, mostly caused by Ronnie’s indiscretions. Eventually, they reach The Grand Theatre at the end of the pier, rumoured to be haunted by spirits from the past. Ronnie and Bernard soon discover that the building is hiding a strange and deadly secret, and they have just become the latest to fall into its trap. Frozen in time, along with others from the past, they soon find themselves fighting for survival against a murderous army of ghosts. The Haunted Theatre is a humorous novel set in the 1970s, blending mild supernatural and science fiction elements. Rich in nostalgia, it’s perfect for fans of 1970s sitcoms, classic-era Doctor Who , and the golden age of the great British seaside.